I love pointless outrage. I like to think that I have mastered the ability to get upset about nothing. But the rage towards the reboot of The Fantastic Four film is funny. Most people are mad that The Human Torch is being played by a Black guy to which I reply “Its the fucking Fantastic Four...” meaning “Who gives a fuck?!” A little bit ago I defended Ben Affleck as Batman and this time I'm not gonna strongly attempt to defend a Black Human Torch so much as make you all realize that this isn't worth getting upset about.
There is this video that Max Landis, the writer of the second best superhero film Chronicle, made called The Death And Return Of Superman where the first thing he says is “Nobody gives a fuck about Superman.” That is how I feel about FF (I'm not typing their name a hundred goddamn times). This new movie is directed by Josh Trank who directed Chronicle which makes me far less concerned if this movie will be cool. Forget trying to convince people that a Black guy can be a fictional character. Getting me to even be interested in seeing a FF movie is far more remarkable.
The new cast consist of Jamie Bell (Billy Elliot, Man On A Ledge), Michael B. Jordan (Chronicle, The Wire), Kate Mara (We Are Marshall, 127 Hours), and Miles Teller (Footloose 2011). I know there are people that have read the comic books and have an attachment to these characters. That's good. But no one likes these characters so much that they get upset about this new film. Its just a bunch of internet racists that are raging about it. “You can't have a Black guy play the Human Torch!” Black guy played Kingpin. English guy played Tony Stark's dad. An Australian played The Red Skull. But god forbid a Black dude plays Human Torch! Oh no! That is just too much!
Forget the fact that even if they wanted the guy who played Human Torch in the previous two films couldn't do it if they even wanted since he has been that guy as well as in Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, The Losers, Captain America, The Avengers, and Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World. He's been spread thin. And in case anyone has forgotten, those FF films were fucking garbage! Garbage, I say!
And should we talk about the version that came out in 1994? Is that off limits?
Look. Everyone calm down. The movie is gonna do great no matter who plays Human Torch. You know why? Because its a FF movie. No one cares. Will I see it? Yes. Because I like the director and Jordan. Its not like they have a Black dude playing Electro or anything, right?
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